Surreal, yet true. It is only now really starting to sink in what we have known since the beginning of September; Crannie will be a big sister for the second time, Beebster will be a big sister for the first time, and we will be parents for the third time.
I've realized that, like everything in our lives, it is all going to fall into place and work out perfectly. I could not be more excited, although of course that excitement is still lined with many fears. I constantly worry about making sure I divide my attention as equally as possible between Maddie and Faith. Now I worry about how I will do that with three. That is my main fear, and it overwhelms me at times. But, I know that it will work just as it always has with our little women. I worry about my big girl Crannie, my sweet "helper" girl. She will be just a little over 4 years old, and now a sister for the second time. I felt as though it was not fair to her. And, then I realized that Faith is literally the best gift we have ever given her. It is almost as though she was meant to be a big sister with her genuine love that she feels for her little Beebster. I worry about my baby girl Beebster, the littlest woman who was supposed to remain our baby forever. Our time together as just the two of us was to come when Maddie started school. Now, she will share me again. I realized, again, that we have been blessed with two incredibly sweet little girls. I know that Faith will be as amazing a big sister to this next baby as Maddie has always been to her. She has someone to emulate after all. And, Cran and Beebster will be two heroes to this next little one, I just know it.
Maddie is insistent that she wants another baby sister like her Beebster, although she has said that if it is a boy she would like him to be named either Prince Phillip or Santa Claus. If it is a girl, she likes the name "beautiful sparkly holiday princess." That would make for quite the birth certificate.
Beebster amazes me. Maddie was never this in tune with babies at Faith's age as Faith has been since becoming a big cousin for the first time in February. Maddie's relationship with Faith really grew stronger and stronger over time, but I think Faith already seems bonded. She reminds me so much of Donovan when he was 14 months old and Faith was first born. He was always so interested in Faith. Then, Ella was born when Faith was 14 months old. She has always been so attached to miss Ella. She wants to pat her and hug her all the time. And, she is incredibly gentle. Then, Tyler was born when Faith was 18 months old. She has always been so interested in him as well, and really adores her baby cousins. She is already interested in my stomach, and when we ask her if she is ready to be a big sister she answers enthusiastically, "essss!" She will be 2 1/2, which gives her 8 more months than Maddie had before being thrust into the role of big sister. So, I am reassured by that as well.
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